[ That's very preferable at the moment — not even having to move for the demonstration. He takes his time trailing his hands down Tech Boy's body in appreciation, slowing to a stop at his hips. ]
They're an extension of your own will. [ And not sentient, he reminds himself. ] So I'm going to assume I don't need to put on pants for this.
[ Actually he's going to assume neither of them have to be clothed for this, and Tech Boy needs to shed some layers if he's coming to bed, so they might as well get a head start on that at the same time. Efficiency. Hooking the fingers of one hand into the waistband of Tech Boy's pants, K's focus remains on the god's face as he begins undoing them. Still without any particular urgency behind his actions, which is only in part because of the lingering effects of the vape; it's clear he's just enjoying himself. His smile returns as his expression softens with a fond look. ]
[ With a soft breath of a laugh, Tech Boy's hands fall gently to K's to stop him from making more progress undressing him. He doesn't move them, just gets in the way enough to interrupt. ] There's no need for pants, but it does require a little bit of concentration on my part, and if you do that, I won't be able to concentrate anymore. [ Even so, he walks his fingers over K's abs for a few steps. He really likes that look on K's face. Whatever he can do to keep inspiring that expression, he'll try his best.
Tech Boy could easily have stayed just this way. The offer of bed and dozing while being read to is really tempting. But he also does really like to show off and, in doing so, gives him a chance to flex his powers before this dream world decides to strip him of the privilege again. He hesitates simply to prolong the uninterrupted moment between them.
True to his word, he doesn't have to move to bring the Children online, but he does flutter his eyes closed. The phone screen lights up where it's still sitting on K's piano. A moment later, there's a soft digital sound as one forms seemingly out of nothing. Faceless, the male form is dressed simply in all black and stands with a relaxed posture, hands in his pockets in a manner very similar to Tech Boy himself.
And now to watch K's reaction closely. ] What do you think?
[ It could be an enjoyable exercise, seeing how well Tech Boy is able to maintain his concentration while being provided with other distractions. Another time, maybe, when nerves aren't so raw and it's less likely to be taken as a challenge to prove himself. Though it occurs to K that some of the testing humans forced him to undergo isn't unlike that premise — which puts a damper on the thought, and he has an uncomfortable moment realising he has little idea of what even constitutes "fun". Particularly for a god.
He obliges the request by stilling his hands. For a moment, at least, and then he takes one of Tech Boy's hands between his own while he manifests one of the Children. The construct is. Not entirely horrifying? But as he stares at it, he can easily imagine they must be disturbing for humans to encounter, and perhaps intentionally so. His expression ebbs into a troubled look, though not for the reasons Tech Boy may assume. ]
They're part of you. [ Thoughtfully, while running his thumb across the back of Tech Boy's hand, and he looks from the construct back to him. ] You said they serve the new gods. You're the only one who's able to control them?
[ Given his own experiences with being controlled by others, it shouldn't be surprising that that's where his mind goes first — now concerned that it's Tech Boy, himself, possibly being forced to do things he'd rather not. ]
[ Despite his inability to be two places at once, Tech Boy's multitasking skills are second-to-none. He would enjoy showing them off if the right distraction could be provided. Currently, he is a bit raw about, well, everything really, but the god'll never skip a chance to demonstrate and brag about his skills.
The troubled look worries Tech Boy, and he narrows his eyes slightly in thought.
And in response to the comment, he actually looks away. ]
They're a part of me. I offer them to aid the New Gods in Mr. World's war. [ He almost omits mentioning the war, but in truth he'd never extended the use of the Children to the other gods until such a need arose. For exactly the reason that K fears. Doing things he doesn't want to do. But that's the way in war, isn't it? ] I control them exclusively, but there are times when other's orders need to be followed.
[ The construct gives a small bow then takes a seat at K's piano. He begins to play softly. Despite the bizarre appearance, the playing is quite skilled, an extension of Tech Boy's own ability. ]
[ Despite the shift back into the emotional minefield of difficult topics, the unexpected mood music surprises a smile from K, and he's taking note of what's being played — hoping that it's an indication of Tech Boy's own preferences. ]
A war... That's why you don't get along with Sweeney and Shadow Moon. [ He guesses. And while he's yet to meet the latter party, Sweeney has told him a few things that are suddenly making more sense. After several moments' consideration, he reaches up and gently cups Tech Boy's cheek with a hand again, not forcing him to look back, but offering reassurance. Being allowed this kind of tactile contact now has opened up avenues for comfort that weren't previously available to him, and he's taking full advantage of it. ]
You choose to fight in it? [ He very carefully asks. ]
[ Tech Boy's nose wrinkles at the sound of the leprechaun's name but nods. He's opting for the longer version because, well, he brought the damn thing up himself. ] The Old Gods are dying in droves because we, the New Gods, are replacing them in America. It's my job to bring the old fucks into the fold, to give them new avenues to reach their worshipers, to give them the opportunity to partner with the winning side to get their message out, to boost their signal before it goes out entirely. [ He makes a derisive sound through his teeth. ] But the Old Gods and those that serve them, like Mad Sweeney, are set in their ways and are determined to die fighting rather than adapt to a changing world. So it's going to end up being a bloodbath. [ His brow furrows. ] Shadow Moon is a special case. He works for the opposition, but he's human so his role is unclear. We've made a truce here because I really haven't got anything against him. Not really. The war's not personal. It's progress.
[ There's no "live and let live" when there's only so much worship to go around in a country that's steadily growing more atheist. It may not come off sounding like the noblest of causes, but it's all he's got. He's been working this angle on the Old Gods for a long time. Longer than a "new" god would like to admit. Does he choose to fight in it? ]
Sure. [ That isn't a strong "yes." ] But it's not really a choice, is it? Progress or death.
[ K's grown so accustomed to receiving fragments of information here and there about Tech Boy's life that having the broad strokes of his situation finally laid out is a very welcome surprise, even if it gives him more cause to be concerned.
That he's essentially a divine recruiter is... interesting, to say the least. As much as K likes him and finds him easy to get along with on a personal level, he isn't oblivious to the god's behaviour in general, nor the way others probably find his personality abrasive at best. Still, why would the old gods be so resistant to adapting in order to survive? ]
Sweeney mentioned Wednesday having Shadow's wife murdered to make him a better soldier. Interesting tactics for one's employer to use. [ The thinly veiled insinuation being that the gods seem remarkably human, from what he's heard, and not necessarily in good ways. Present company excluded, naturally — Tech Boy has treated him far better than humans ever have. ]
Not much of a choice. [ He agrees with a frown. And that sounds rather familiar. Progress or death. Obedience or death. ] Is it that they're set in their ways, or something about what your side's offering makes death seem more appealing than cooperation?
[ ...Is Mr. World "offering" enslavement, in other words. ]
I didn't know that about Wednesday. Sounds exactly like the conniving tactics he'd use, but I can't believe the old fuck actually had the stones to go through with it. [ Tech Boy presses his lips together in thought. ] Wednesday's one of the Old war gods. He's the one who wants the fight to get bloody. I've parlayed with him a few times, but he's gotten out of hand recently. Thinking he's still relevant. That he's better than everyone else just because he's been around for a few millennia. The Old Gods have lost touch with reality.
[ He's still not really looking at K, and for a moment he closes his eyes again to reset. Talking about this stuff isn't helpful in Deerington other than to color K's opinion of him as the topic is getting him worked up, and not in the fun way. The piano music smoothly transitions into something a little different as Tech Boy fights down a fresh wave of anxiety. The truth is that the gods are terribly, terribly human. And not in a good way. ]
Who knows what makes the old coots so resistant? [ Spoken quietly, it's not actually a question. He shakes his head. ] Why would anyone rather die than simply learn a modern way of getting the same results? Why wait for someone to sacrifice a white-haired goat at midnight during a full moon when they can just click a hyperlink instead? I don't get it. [ and he really doesn't. ]
You don't-- [ his still dilated gaze seeks to meet K's again, uncertainty hiding in the look. ] really want to hear about any of this, do you?
[ The question is met with an incredulous look and long silence as K struggles to understand how that conclusion was even reached. Because he's asking the wrong questions? How did he manage to fuck this up already? That has to be a new record. Inwardly sighing, he has to resist the urge to express his frustration outwardly, knowing it will probably just exacerbate the situation. ]
I've been asking about these things for months, trying to learn more about your life. You don't like talking about it. [ It's a delicate emphasis placed on that you, not accusatory. ] And that's fine, I've tried to respect that, but what's given you the impression I'm not interested now? Now, when you're finally giving me the answers to my questions instead of changing the subject.
[ Unless that is, in fact, what Tech Boy is attempting to do right now.
And maybe he's a little hurt, but he's doing his best not to show that, either. Because he doesn't want to make this about his feelings — he wants to understand Tech Boy's. ]
[ K's exactly right. He doesn't like talking about it. The whole war business had once been so clear and so immediate, but the longer he's separated from it, the less relevant and muddier it all seems. Operating on his own had taught the Technical Boy a thing or two about his role in all of this, and so had his struggle to foster the free will growing in K's strict programming. The similarities between the two are not lost on him. But there's more to it than that. ]
Nothing. [ he admits. ] Nothing has given me that impression. [ He bites down on his own lip, nearly hard enough to draw blood. ] You're respectful, and you've been very patient. You deserve straight answers.
Do you know you're the first non-god I've said any of this to? Other than Shadow, but he's Wednesday's--[ a dismissive hand gesture ] whatever. Fucking pawn, I guess, so he doesn't count. [ He gives a soft sigh. ] The impending war back where I came from is hardly relevant here in this version of reality because there's no one here to fight it, other than some old leprechaun who'd take my head off if he gets the chance again. Bringing it up seems to serve no purpose other than to listen to the sound of my own voice. And if I'm talking, not doing, that's where I start to lose people's attention. [ which is the crux of the matter, the reason he asked about K's sincerity of interest. ] Typically, anyway. They think I don't notice, but I do.
[ Which is doubly a shame because the technology god both really loves to talk and really enjoys the sound of his own voice. He likes to know things and to share information, but he does come on a little strong. ]
I won't change the subject. The New Gods fight for a good cause--you've even shown me what one possible victory looks like--but it's still fucking messy. I can tell you that my role is to coax the Old Gods out of their primitive caves and into the light of the New way. We are the ones providing the platform, but each god gets to decide their own fate. We're offering exposure, distribution, advertising. Many have done very well on my watch. Who knows why they won't take the deal. I don't ask for much. [ It's less like enslavement and more like the mob, favors owed and all that. And Tech Boy collects on his. ]
I care what you think of me, K. It's not a clean break if I start digging into the details. War is fucking brutal. [ At some point, he silently dismissed the Child from the piano, and they're alone now. ] And I don't want you tired of the sound of my voice.
[ Looking uncertain, K eventually lowers his hand from Tech Boy's face and rests it back on his thigh as he listens without interrupting. It's what he excels at: absorbing information without reacting or offering an opinion, just as he's been programmed to do. It can be useful. Though he does speak up afterward. ]
Bringing it up serves the purpose of allowing me to understand you better. [ Among other things. But that's the heart of the matter for him, and why he's been so interested in the topics surrounding Tech Boy's godhood and how worship affects him. Wanting to know about what he faced in his homeworld is part of that. ]
You're holding me to the same low standards you've come to expect from everyone. [ He surmises. That much is clear, at least. ] It's understandable. [ Even if it plays on his own insecurities in the worst ways at times. ] But I hope you'll think better of me in the future.
[ His tone is soft as his gaze drifts to where the Child had been, wondering at its absence, and when he looks back he resumes running his hands along Tech Boy's thighs. Unhurried and without any particular intent. It's tempting to finish what he'd started and finally get those pants off, but for the moment he holds off. ]
What do you ask for? If you don't mind answering. [ There's still so many things he wants to know more about, but—
If the only way to satisfy my curiosity is at the expense of your comfort, it isn't worth it. You don't have to answer. But I'll never get tired of you talking with me. About anything. ]
[ Tech Boy glances away again, frowning slightly. ] I have been setting the bar too low. Yes. I'll do better about that in the future. [ It's the voice and mannerism of someone who is both used to being let down and used to letting down others. ]
I do think really highly of you. [ His gaze slides to the movement of K's hands. ] Honest.
[ The question and the clarification give him pause. It still feels like an uncomfortable subject, but he does want to sate K's curiosity. It's not a guilty feeling exactly, but some of the specifics requires a much longer explanation/justification he's not really prepared to get into tonight. ]
Favors. [ He shrugs. ] It varies based on each god's specialty. Sometimes it's a miracle. Or a parlor trick. Sometimes it's simply to be in the right place at the right time, attending meetings with the right people. Usually in the service of our side of the war. Sometimes not. [ Moving as little as possible, he retrieves the vape and drags on it before continuing. ] They don't know what it'll be when they agree. Fuck, I don't know what it'll be when they agree. I've had to learn to choose the right moments.
[ Tech Boy looks toward his hands and K decides he may as well provide him with something worth watching, finally acting on the impulse to finish unfastening his pants for him — and intentionally makes a show of it, skirting the boundaries of suggestive implication. Inexperienced as he is, he's also observant. Tech Boy seems to appreciate this kind of personal attention.
Not wanting to give the impression he isn't interested in the answer to his question, though, he leaves it at that for the moment, afterward reaching up to begin working on the layers of shirts he still has to contend with before Tech Boy will be bare enough for his liking. He's taking his time with it, gently pulling the vape away so he can peel one sleeve down and off of Tech Boy's arm before handing the vape back to him. ]
Favours are useful... and smart. Adaptable to suit your needs.
[ Favours aren't so bad. Rather, aren't as bad as some of the possibilities he'd been entertaining — not that he thinks poorly of Tech Boy. But he does in fact have an idea of how brutal war is, regardless of who's involved or what the stakes are. It's an ugly business. ]
But if they don't know what you'll one day require of them, I can also understand why some gods may be hesitant to agree to those terms. [ He pauses, watching the smoke as it drifts upward. ] I would be, if I didn't know you as well as I do. And I imagine I may not stand to lose as much as a god could, even if I can theoretically live as long as you do.
[ Because there are far worse things than dying, he feels. He tilts his head, watching Tech Boy now. ]
If it were possible to choose, would you return to your homeworld and this war?
[ As a god (and with his chronically insecure personality), Tech Boy does indeed like this kind of personal attention. It's a bit distracting from the growing storm cloud of his personal melancholy... and fewer clothes is always better. Wasn't there a mention of bed? To sleep or to do other things? To sleep perchance to dream? Despite the topic of conversation, the thought causes him to giggle to himself a bit as he twists a bit to help K remove a layer or two of his ridiculous(ly fashionable) outfit.
But the topic of favors is more complicated. There have been things that Tech Boy has asked for that K would likely not want to hear. Some of the requests had been quite nasty. War is hell, after all. ]
Why not risk it? Trust me. Have a little faith. If they don't take the deal, they'll die out anyway. All I really have to do is wait. But it's better if they learn to work with what we're offering. It's a good life. [ Mostly. ] Better than what they've got without us.
[ He'd been thinking about this. ] When I first got here, I would have given anything to go back. The tech here is so fucking stone age compared to where I was. And even that is light years behind what I saw in your world. [ He presses his lips together in thought. ] My world rejected me. You accepted me. Why the fuck would I want to go back to that war now?
[ Maybe the old gods would rather die on their own terms, he thinks but doesn't say, knowing he may be projecting too much of himself into that supposition. But from everything that he finally knows about the gods, their war, the myriad particularities of worship... it really doesn't seem like a bad deal. Though it's likely there's a lot Tech Boy's leaving out, too. The finer details.
And K does appreciate those. He pauses in undressing Tech Boy to examine the shirt he's just worked off, rubbing the fabric between his fingers, maybe a little distracted. The Bufotenin is still affecting him, having eased into a low, pleasant buzz. But he's still tracking their conversation and looks up, surprised by Tech Boy's answer. A smile soon follows. ]
Whatever ends up happening, if it's possible to stay together in some way... [ Leaning closer, he kisses the corner of Tech Boy's mouth. ] I'd like to. You'll always have a place with me.
[ They may not have been given a choice in being brought here, but who's to say what the future holds? With so little known about Sodder and Deerington and the true limits of this place, anything seems possible. Reaching to continue his efforts removing all those layers of clothes, he runs his hands along Tech Boy's bare skin once he finds some. ]
What would you like to do instead of fighting the war? Imagine you can do anything. What would that be?
[ Had K mentioned that aloud, Tech Boy would have had to admit that he also would prefer to die on his own terms, but that's not often the fate of gods. It had never been his. Technology never really died; it just changed. Upgraded at the behest of the World to accommodate the needs of his disciples. The Technical Boy had been retired against his own will. Not on his own terms (unlike Media's self-imposed upgrade). It's all bullshit is what it is. All of it.
But what isn't bullshit is the position he's in now. Quite solidly the opposite. Freshly peeled of his layers, he's pleasantly distracted by the physical sensation of K's hands against his skin. If TB could manage to relax his mind just a little more, it would be easy enough to compartmentalize the heavy conversation and just do this instead. Simply being in K's presence made him feel better, everything else is extra. But his mind is frustratingly still participating in the (albeit very informative) conversation. ]
If it's possible. I'd like that.
[ TB places his hands on K's shoulders and kisses him surprisingly gently on the lips, drawing out the sensation. He uses the end of the vape to draw little circles against K's skin. ]
It's not all war duties all the time. But if I didn't have to do them at all, I'd go back to creating. Exclusively. I'm a god after all. That's what I do. [ He taps the tip of his nose against K's. ] I'm inspiring.
[ Creating. It's hard not to feel envious of that ability. K's perfect recall makes memorisation essentially effortless and accelerates his ability to learn, and he can imitate, emulate, simulate with varying degrees of efficiency... but true creativity has remained beyond his reach, likely another intentional limitation of his programming. (The seemingly inane little circuit board critters he'll end up piecing together in a few weeks will, in fact, reflect a significant leap in his development.)
The kiss is distracting, and he doesn't lose his train of thought so much as it momentarily jumps track, but with some difficulty he keeps the inappropriate comments about exactly what Tech Boy inspires in him to himself. This conversation feels too important to make light of it. But his posture does noticeably loosen beneath Tech Boy's touch as his own hands are wandering back to the god's waist, slipping past his remaining clothing to touch the bare skin of his hips. ]
That sounds nice. You can do that here, too, can't you? [ Even if the general level of technology is far less advanced than Tech Boy's accustomed to. Excluding the Fluids and network, presumably. ] Have you ever inspired the humans here?
[ One can practically hear the gears in his mind turning now; he has a lot of questions. And it's leading back into potentially sensitive territory. ] Do any knowingly worship you?
[ More importantly, if they do, why was his own willing offer of worship rejected? ]
[ Oh hmmmm that's a complicated question. One that Tech Boy isn't certain K's going to like the answer to, given their past foray into the conversation of worship. The physical contact of each of their hands on the other's bare skin has the effect of closing a circuit between them, and that circuit eases a rising feeling of nervousness. Worship is different when it comes to K than with the humans, and having never faced it before meeting K, he's still working it out a bit himself. He knows what he feels, but how to explain it...? ]
What powers I have to create are limited here. Sure, I can work with the limited tech that this place offers, but I'm operating as a programmer or an engineer, not as a god should. [ He's frowning. ] I haven't come across anyone receptive to my particular brand of inspiration. No one worthy. [ He meets K's eyes. ] Until you.
[ Then he hangs his head slightly. ] There are a few, 3 or maybe 4, who do knowingly worship me by using the Network knowing that it gives me power. Nothing more than that. I haven't been exactly broadcasting my divinity, because then people start to want things, so it's only a select few who are in the knowledge loop. The others, every other person who uses the Network or invents an electric powered device or creates something that doesn't belong in this vaguely 1950's aesthetic... they worship ignorantly. Passively. But it's enough to keep the lights on. To keep me alive.
I am a New God. Old forms of worship just don't do it for me. Churches and altars and prayers and sacrifices--well, a person sacrifices their time to me with or without their knowledge and that is something I can take to the bank--are all old news. Using the gifts that I have given to the world, using my tech, that's where the power comes from.
[ He slides a hand to again rest over K's heart. ] Every strong heartbeat. I can feel it.
[ K listens with interest and without interruption, though the explanation has him feeling even less certain of where or how he — and his worship — fit into the equation, or if he even does, when he isn't human. At least he can intentionally use technology with all of this in mind now, knowing that's how Tech Boy needs to be worshipped, for whatever good it might do. It can't hurt. But it also seems safer to assume any power drawn from his worship and belief is null compared to what humans can provide for Tech Boy, rather than getting his hopes up and having to face inevitable disappointment later. A lesson he's already well-versed in. Given what he is, there's also the distinct possibility that letting someone "use" him might be a more effective form of worship...
Being deemed worthy of receiving inspiration raises even more questions than it answers. And he wants to ask about the specifics, but hesitates, reaching to cover Tech Boy's hand with his own. He hadn't meant to turn the invitation to come over into a full on interrogation; it's just a struggle when there's still so much he feels he doesn't understand about Tech Boy and the nature of gods, but he wants to. And he's finally been getting answers to his questions tonight.
But he doesn't want to take without giving anything in return, so for the moment sets aside his endless questions to hold up his end of the "bargain", such as it was. ]
I think you've earned a break from my curiosity. Right now the only thing I want from you is for you to come to bed with me. Come on.
[ And he helps Tech Boy up, assisting with the removal of his pants before collecting his vape and leading him back to the bedroom. The memory of his nightmare prevents K from wanting to attempt to sleep again, so for the remainder of the night he'll make good on the offer to read to Tech Boy and distract him in other, even more pleasant ways. He'll be returning to that conversation soon enough, and hopefully Tech Boy remains willing to answer his questions. ]
You deserve your curiosity. You can ask me anything you want. I don't intend to keep any secrets from you. [ Not intentionally anyway. He has no concept of what is necessary or even interesting knowledge about himself and his divinity, so K would have to lead that interrogation if he wanted information. True, some topics were painful, but K had given him permission to be vulnerable, and that in itself is a gift.
But the conversation had turned much more intense than he'd been expecting from a silly text and an invitation to join him. No, that isn't right. Tech Boy had been expecting a conversation like this eventually--and expects many more in the future. There's a lot to unpack about being involved with a god from one's distant past, and a lot more to discover from an android from one's technologically advanced (possibly alternate) future.
After shedding clothing and moving back to the bedroom, Tech Boy decides that what he wants most right now is to curl up under blankets, pressed against K, skin against skin. Whether this leads to relaxing reading or more excuses to test out the physical effects of Tech Boy's designer drug on K's body remains to be seen.
He gets comfortable, face nuzzled into the side of K's neck so that his lips brush the skin, and he recites softly. ]
One opal cloudlet in an oval form Reflects the rainbow of a thunderstorm Which in a distant valley has been staged-- For we are most artistically caged.
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They're an extension of your own will. [ And not sentient, he reminds himself. ] So I'm going to assume I don't need to put on pants for this.
[ Actually he's going to assume neither of them have to be clothed for this, and Tech Boy needs to shed some layers if he's coming to bed, so they might as well get a head start on that at the same time. Efficiency. Hooking the fingers of one hand into the waistband of Tech Boy's pants, K's focus remains on the god's face as he begins undoing them. Still without any particular urgency behind his actions, which is only in part because of the lingering effects of the vape; it's clear he's just enjoying himself. His smile returns as his expression softens with a fond look. ]
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Tech Boy could easily have stayed just this way. The offer of bed and dozing while being read to is really tempting. But he also does really like to show off and, in doing so, gives him a chance to flex his powers before this dream world decides to strip him of the privilege again. He hesitates simply to prolong the uninterrupted moment between them.
True to his word, he doesn't have to move to bring the Children online, but he does flutter his eyes closed. The phone screen lights up where it's still sitting on K's piano. A moment later, there's a soft digital sound as one forms seemingly out of nothing. Faceless, the male form is dressed simply in all black and stands with a relaxed posture, hands in his pockets in a manner very similar to Tech Boy himself.
And now to watch K's reaction closely. ] What do you think?
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He obliges the request by stilling his hands. For a moment, at least, and then he takes one of Tech Boy's hands between his own while he manifests one of the Children. The construct is. Not entirely horrifying? But as he stares at it, he can easily imagine they must be disturbing for humans to encounter, and perhaps intentionally so. His expression ebbs into a troubled look, though not for the reasons Tech Boy may assume. ]
They're part of you. [ Thoughtfully, while running his thumb across the back of Tech Boy's hand, and he looks from the construct back to him. ] You said they serve the new gods. You're the only one who's able to control them?
[ Given his own experiences with being controlled by others, it shouldn't be surprising that that's where his mind goes first — now concerned that it's Tech Boy, himself, possibly being forced to do things he'd rather not. ]
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The troubled look worries Tech Boy, and he narrows his eyes slightly in thought.
And in response to the comment, he actually looks away. ]
They're a part of me. I offer them to aid the New Gods in Mr. World's war. [ He almost omits mentioning the war, but in truth he'd never extended the use of the Children to the other gods until such a need arose. For exactly the reason that K fears. Doing things he doesn't want to do. But that's the way in war, isn't it? ] I control them exclusively, but there are times when other's orders need to be followed.
[ The construct gives a small bow then takes a seat at K's piano. He begins to play softly. Despite the bizarre appearance, the playing is quite skilled, an extension of Tech Boy's own ability. ]
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A war... That's why you don't get along with Sweeney and Shadow Moon. [ He guesses. And while he's yet to meet the latter party, Sweeney has told him a few things that are suddenly making more sense. After several moments' consideration, he reaches up and gently cups Tech Boy's cheek with a hand again, not forcing him to look back, but offering reassurance. Being allowed this kind of tactile contact now has opened up avenues for comfort that weren't previously available to him, and he's taking full advantage of it. ]
You choose to fight in it? [ He very carefully asks. ]
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[ There's no "live and let live" when there's only so much worship to go around in a country that's steadily growing more atheist. It may not come off sounding like the noblest of causes, but it's all he's got. He's been working this angle on the Old Gods for a long time. Longer than a "new" god would like to admit. Does he choose to fight in it? ]
Sure. [ That isn't a strong "yes." ] But it's not really a choice, is it? Progress or death.
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That he's essentially a divine recruiter is... interesting, to say the least. As much as K likes him and finds him easy to get along with on a personal level, he isn't oblivious to the god's behaviour in general, nor the way others probably find his personality abrasive at best. Still, why would the old gods be so resistant to adapting in order to survive? ]
Sweeney mentioned Wednesday having Shadow's wife murdered to make him a better soldier. Interesting tactics for one's employer to use. [ The thinly veiled insinuation being that the gods seem remarkably human, from what he's heard, and not necessarily in good ways. Present company excluded, naturally — Tech Boy has treated him far better than humans ever have. ]
Not much of a choice. [ He agrees with a frown. And that sounds rather familiar. Progress or death. Obedience or death. ] Is it that they're set in their ways, or something about what your side's offering makes death seem more appealing than cooperation?
[ ...Is Mr. World "offering" enslavement, in other words. ]
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[ He's still not really looking at K, and for a moment he closes his eyes again to reset. Talking about this stuff isn't helpful in Deerington other than to color K's opinion of him as the topic is getting him worked up, and not in the fun way. The piano music smoothly transitions into something a little different as Tech Boy fights down a fresh wave of anxiety. The truth is that the gods are terribly, terribly human. And not in a good way. ]
Who knows what makes the old coots so resistant? [ Spoken quietly, it's not actually a question. He shakes his head. ] Why would anyone rather die than simply learn a modern way of getting the same results? Why wait for someone to sacrifice a white-haired goat at midnight during a full moon when they can just click a hyperlink instead? I don't get it. [ and he really doesn't. ]
You don't-- [ his still dilated gaze seeks to meet K's again, uncertainty hiding in the look. ] really want to hear about any of this, do you?
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I've been asking about these things for months, trying to learn more about your life. You don't like talking about it. [ It's a delicate emphasis placed on that you, not accusatory. ] And that's fine, I've tried to respect that, but what's given you the impression I'm not interested now? Now, when you're finally giving me the answers to my questions instead of changing the subject.
[ Unless that is, in fact, what Tech Boy is attempting to do right now.
And maybe he's a little hurt, but he's doing his best not to show that, either. Because he doesn't want to make this about his feelings — he wants to understand Tech Boy's. ]
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Nothing. [ he admits. ] Nothing has given me that impression. [ He bites down on his own lip, nearly hard enough to draw blood. ] You're respectful, and you've been very patient. You deserve straight answers.
Do you know you're the first non-god I've said any of this to? Other than Shadow, but he's Wednesday's--[ a dismissive hand gesture ] whatever. Fucking pawn, I guess, so he doesn't count. [ He gives a soft sigh. ] The impending war back where I came from is hardly relevant here in this version of reality because there's no one here to fight it, other than some old leprechaun who'd take my head off if he gets the chance again. Bringing it up seems to serve no purpose other than to listen to the sound of my own voice. And if I'm talking, not doing, that's where I start to lose people's attention. [ which is the crux of the matter, the reason he asked about K's sincerity of interest. ] Typically, anyway. They think I don't notice, but I do.
[ Which is doubly a shame because the technology god both really loves to talk and really enjoys the sound of his own voice. He likes to know things and to share information, but he does come on a little strong. ]
I won't change the subject. The New Gods fight for a good cause--you've even shown me what one possible victory looks like--but it's still fucking messy. I can tell you that my role is to coax the Old Gods out of their primitive caves and into the light of the New way. We are the ones providing the platform, but each god gets to decide their own fate. We're offering exposure, distribution, advertising. Many have done very well on my watch. Who knows why they won't take the deal. I don't ask for much. [ It's less like enslavement and more like the mob, favors owed and all that. And Tech Boy collects on his. ]
I care what you think of me, K. It's not a clean break if I start digging into the details. War is fucking brutal. [ At some point, he silently dismissed the Child from the piano, and they're alone now. ] And I don't want you tired of the sound of my voice.
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Bringing it up serves the purpose of allowing me to understand you better. [ Among other things. But that's the heart of the matter for him, and why he's been so interested in the topics surrounding Tech Boy's godhood and how worship affects him. Wanting to know about what he faced in his homeworld is part of that. ]
You're holding me to the same low standards you've come to expect from everyone. [ He surmises. That much is clear, at least. ] It's understandable. [ Even if it plays on his own insecurities in the worst ways at times. ] But I hope you'll think better of me in the future.
[ His tone is soft as his gaze drifts to where the Child had been, wondering at its absence, and when he looks back he resumes running his hands along Tech Boy's thighs. Unhurried and without any particular intent. It's tempting to finish what he'd started and finally get those pants off, but for the moment he holds off. ]
What do you ask for? If you don't mind answering. [ There's still so many things he wants to know more about, but—
If the only way to satisfy my curiosity is at the expense of your comfort, it isn't worth it. You don't have to answer. But I'll never get tired of you talking with me. About anything. ]
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I do think really highly of you. [ His gaze slides to the movement of K's hands. ] Honest.
[ The question and the clarification give him pause. It still feels like an uncomfortable subject, but he does want to sate K's curiosity. It's not a guilty feeling exactly, but some of the specifics requires a much longer explanation/justification he's not really prepared to get into tonight. ]
Favors. [ He shrugs. ] It varies based on each god's specialty. Sometimes it's a miracle. Or a parlor trick. Sometimes it's simply to be in the right place at the right time, attending meetings with the right people. Usually in the service of our side of the war. Sometimes not. [ Moving as little as possible, he retrieves the vape and drags on it before continuing. ] They don't know what it'll be when they agree. Fuck, I don't know what it'll be when they agree. I've had to learn to choose the right moments.
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Not wanting to give the impression he isn't interested in the answer to his question, though, he leaves it at that for the moment, afterward reaching up to begin working on the layers of shirts he still has to contend with before Tech Boy will be bare enough for his liking. He's taking his time with it, gently pulling the vape away so he can peel one sleeve down and off of Tech Boy's arm before handing the vape back to him. ]
Favours are useful... and smart. Adaptable to suit your needs.
[ Favours aren't so bad. Rather, aren't as bad as some of the possibilities he'd been entertaining — not that he thinks poorly of Tech Boy. But he does in fact have an idea of how brutal war is, regardless of who's involved or what the stakes are. It's an ugly business. ]
But if they don't know what you'll one day require of them, I can also understand why some gods may be hesitant to agree to those terms. [ He pauses, watching the smoke as it drifts upward. ] I would be, if I didn't know you as well as I do. And I imagine I may not stand to lose as much as a god could, even if I can theoretically live as long as you do.
[ Because there are far worse things than dying, he feels. He tilts his head, watching Tech Boy now. ]
If it were possible to choose, would you return to your homeworld and this war?
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But the topic of favors is more complicated. There have been things that Tech Boy has asked for that K would likely not want to hear. Some of the requests had been quite nasty. War is hell, after all. ]
Why not risk it? Trust me. Have a little faith. If they don't take the deal, they'll die out anyway. All I really have to do is wait. But it's better if they learn to work with what we're offering. It's a good life. [ Mostly. ] Better than what they've got without us.
[ He'd been thinking about this. ] When I first got here, I would have given anything to go back. The tech here is so fucking stone age compared to where I was. And even that is light years behind what I saw in your world. [ He presses his lips together in thought. ] My world rejected me. You accepted me. Why the fuck would I want to go back to that war now?
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And K does appreciate those. He pauses in undressing Tech Boy to examine the shirt he's just worked off, rubbing the fabric between his fingers, maybe a little distracted. The Bufotenin is still affecting him, having eased into a low, pleasant buzz. But he's still tracking their conversation and looks up, surprised by Tech Boy's answer. A smile soon follows. ]
Whatever ends up happening, if it's possible to stay together in some way... [ Leaning closer, he kisses the corner of Tech Boy's mouth. ] I'd like to. You'll always have a place with me.
[ They may not have been given a choice in being brought here, but who's to say what the future holds? With so little known about Sodder and Deerington and the true limits of this place, anything seems possible. Reaching to continue his efforts removing all those layers of clothes, he runs his hands along Tech Boy's bare skin once he finds some. ]
What would you like to do instead of fighting the war? Imagine you can do anything. What would that be?
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But what isn't bullshit is the position he's in now. Quite solidly the opposite. Freshly peeled of his layers, he's pleasantly distracted by the physical sensation of K's hands against his skin. If TB could manage to relax his mind just a little more, it would be easy enough to compartmentalize the heavy conversation and just do this instead. Simply being in K's presence made him feel better, everything else is extra. But his mind is frustratingly still participating in the (albeit very informative) conversation. ]
If it's possible. I'd like that.
[ TB places his hands on K's shoulders and kisses him surprisingly gently on the lips, drawing out the sensation. He uses the end of the vape to draw little circles against K's skin. ]
It's not all war duties all the time. But if I didn't have to do them at all, I'd go back to creating. Exclusively. I'm a god after all. That's what I do. [ He taps the tip of his nose against K's. ] I'm inspiring.
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The kiss is distracting, and he doesn't lose his train of thought so much as it momentarily jumps track, but with some difficulty he keeps the inappropriate comments about exactly what Tech Boy inspires in him to himself. This conversation feels too important to make light of it. But his posture does noticeably loosen beneath Tech Boy's touch as his own hands are wandering back to the god's waist, slipping past his remaining clothing to touch the bare skin of his hips. ]
That sounds nice. You can do that here, too, can't you? [ Even if the general level of technology is far less advanced than Tech Boy's accustomed to. Excluding the Fluids and network, presumably. ] Have you ever inspired the humans here?
[ One can practically hear the gears in his mind turning now; he has a lot of questions. And it's leading back into potentially sensitive territory. ] Do any knowingly worship you?
[ More importantly, if they do, why was his own willing offer of worship rejected? ]
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What powers I have to create are limited here. Sure, I can work with the limited tech that this place offers, but I'm operating as a programmer or an engineer, not as a god should. [ He's frowning. ] I haven't come across anyone receptive to my particular brand of inspiration. No one worthy. [ He meets K's eyes. ] Until you.
[ Then he hangs his head slightly. ] There are a few, 3 or maybe 4, who do knowingly worship me by using the Network knowing that it gives me power. Nothing more than that. I haven't been exactly broadcasting my divinity, because then people start to want things, so it's only a select few who are in the knowledge loop. The others, every other person who uses the Network or invents an electric powered device or creates something that doesn't belong in this vaguely 1950's aesthetic... they worship ignorantly. Passively. But it's enough to keep the lights on. To keep me alive.
I am a New God. Old forms of worship just don't do it for me. Churches and altars and prayers and sacrifices--well, a person sacrifices their time to me with or without their knowledge and that is something I can take to the bank--are all old news. Using the gifts that I have given to the world, using my tech, that's where the power comes from.
[ He slides a hand to again rest over K's heart. ] Every strong heartbeat. I can feel it.
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Being deemed worthy of receiving inspiration raises even more questions than it answers. And he wants to ask about the specifics, but hesitates, reaching to cover Tech Boy's hand with his own. He hadn't meant to turn the invitation to come over into a full on interrogation; it's just a struggle when there's still so much he feels he doesn't understand about Tech Boy and the nature of gods, but he wants to. And he's finally been getting answers to his questions tonight.
But he doesn't want to take without giving anything in return, so for the moment sets aside his endless questions to hold up his end of the "bargain", such as it was. ]
I think you've earned a break from my curiosity. Right now the only thing I want from you is for you to come to bed with me. Come on.
[ And he helps Tech Boy up, assisting with the removal of his pants before collecting his vape and leading him back to the bedroom. The memory of his nightmare prevents K from wanting to attempt to sleep again, so for the remainder of the night he'll make good on the offer to read to Tech Boy and distract him in other, even more pleasant ways. He'll be returning to that conversation soon enough, and hopefully Tech Boy remains willing to answer his questions. ]
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But the conversation had turned much more intense than he'd been expecting from a silly text and an invitation to join him. No, that isn't right. Tech Boy had been expecting a conversation like this eventually--and expects many more in the future. There's a lot to unpack about being involved with a god from one's distant past, and a lot more to discover from an android from one's technologically advanced (possibly alternate) future.
After shedding clothing and moving back to the bedroom, Tech Boy decides that what he wants most right now is to curl up under blankets, pressed against K, skin against skin. Whether this leads to relaxing reading or more excuses to test out the physical effects of Tech Boy's designer drug on K's body remains to be seen.
He gets comfortable, face nuzzled into the side of K's neck so that his lips brush the skin, and he recites softly. ]
One opal cloudlet in an oval form
Reflects the rainbow of a thunderstorm
Which in a distant valley has been staged--
For we are most artistically caged.
...what a curious poem.